May
20
Daniel Bass: Twitter Updates for 2012-05-20
- @FranGillespie: I'm on a bus with the real who's who of the bus scene: girl w/eczema, man quietly rapping to himself, someone eating ribs. #
- Take away from today's sermon…a mission requires being obedient to God. Doesn't have to involve traveling the globe to wrestle monkeys. #
- A community is created by a shared purpose. (@ Conduit Church) http://t.co/tg3qZtbC #
- @NowImworried: Now I’m worried that some squirrels will scamper across my roof & cause it to cave in & there’ll be squirrels in my bed. #
- @KenJennings: Obituaries should say how close the dead person was to a free sandwich on all their punch cards. #
- @hereinid: Whoops. Forgot about Google Plus again. #
- @michaelianblack: 99% of you did not do as much mulching as I did today. I am the 1%. #
- @rneighbors: God loves me even when I don't forward those chain letters. #
- @9to5Life: Normal Friday, probably just gonna have a beer, hang out and rant on some Fraggle Rock message boards tonight. #
- @Leemanish: Interests include: repeatedly saying the phrase 'perfectly legal' in a thick Irish accent. #
- @SeanBlazed: Never wear a shirt you can't rip off in a sudden rage. #
- @vladchoc: Hard to believe that there are still tribes in remote parts of the world that haven't seen any of the Naked Gun movies yet. #
- Davin Gets His Pre-K Diploma http://t.co/yfxisy7s #
- @Leemanish: If you're in L.A., don't bother going to the Walgreens on Wilshire – nobody there wants any chili. #
- He's not just a spokesperson…he's also a client. [pic]: http://t.co/QRrvXhYi #
- @nedroid: Why did I pay extra for the kind of ceiling fans that can decapitate a person, why was that even an option?! #
- @vladchoc: One day I hope to have the self esteem required to make a double-decker sandwich for myself as a snack. #
- @blackbeltjonz: Johnny Cash probably went through a lot of lint rollers. #
- @eddiepepitone: to do list: 1) smile at psychopaths I work with. 2) strain yogurt for Det. Smith. 3) slowly, ever so slowly, love myself. #
- @sweet_toof: My passions include pumpernickel muffins, my Firebird, and enunciating the h in front of w in words like 'white' and 'whiz.' #
- @ChrisRRegan: What's the proper "resting" period after you remove the hot dogs from the boiling water? (Also, please DM wine pairings.) #
- Do need a large amount of mulch blown quickly? Call Sunrise of Nashville. No one blows mulch faster. [pic]: http://t.co/NyMRAOBq #
- @vladchoc: If this $16.99 collection of greatest hits from the past four decades doesn't make me happy nothing will. #
- @9to5Life: If your name starts with the letter T, there's a good chance you've unfriended me for calling you "T-Bone" a bazillion times. #
- Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who (cont) http://t.co/VdxQ0pOe #
- @vladchoc: Lowered my meds, looking through old yearbooks. Don't remember graduating with so many pasta dishes. These might be cookbooks. #
- Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the bosom of fools. Ecclesiastes 7:9 #
- @ToastyQuixote: I'd probably be teaching at Harvard by now if my mom had chosen to plan out my activities with the Mini Wheats guy. #
- @biorhythmist: I joke around on here a lot but I am just a regular guy with feelings, flaws, fins, flippers and a blowhole. #
- @MrGeorgeWallace: Gotta stop sleepin' w/ the TV on. Last night had a dream about meerkats runnin' a pawn shop w/ the Real Housewives of NJ. #
- @vladchoc: My 1st thought this morning was of a frog & a cat, both with sexy six pack abs, so no. I don't need drugs to have a good time. #
- @UNTRESOR: Ugh. I've gotta put on 10 more pounds if I'm gonna make banana hammock weight this season. #
- @OuterJohn: "Finally, add a dash of safron, a slice of lemon, empty dish in trash, & toss trash bag in the yard. Serves 8" -raccoon recipe #
- That's my girl! Cayton received an award for her participation in Chorus. (@ Spring Hill Elementary School) [pic]: http://t.co/MbrYctIq #
- For his anger is but for a moment, & his favor is for a lifetime. Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes w/ the morning. Psalm 30:5 #
- @RowdyPrimate: I have pretty high hopes for my "Days Without Accident" line of men's underwear. Should be another Kickstarter success story. #
- @actionstern: So a doggy day care center isn't a day care center run by dogs? I better get my nephew back. #
- @jonathan_katz: A new breakfast cereal – Post apocalyptics with raisins. #
- @trumpetcake: Sitting atop a crane, reading Are You My Mother? through a megaphone. Gonna be a peach of a day! #
- @DennisDMZ: I'm trying to get into the Ranger-Devil game and guess who I saw outside the Garden scalping tickets? Elizabeth Warren! #
- @RowdyPrimate: Whatever doesn't kill you regrets not finishing the job for years afterward. #
- @tomwilliamsisme: 'How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool.' #
- @CarlyCastle: Every time I log onto Twitter I whisper "Hey, weirdos." #
- @michaelianblack: Whole milk strains the same through pantyhose as skim milk. #
- @StevenAmiri: Guy Fieri seems a lot more mellow since leaving Insane Clown Posse. #
- @NowImworried: Now I'm worried that thanks to the Time Magazine cover kids will be breast fed until they're eleven. #
- @sweet_toof: "Maybe if I got in shape, chicks would think I'm hot," I think, as I reach for an itch in the upper patch of my back hair. #
- @mattob34: Travolta's camp slams the allegations, calling them "a complete fiction and fabrication." But enough about Scientology… #
- @PaulAldrichNow: …and Moses said unto the burning bush, "Here, I Am." And the bush said unto Moses, "How did you know my name?" #
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